As I am writing this, my heart is hurting. Sometimes I make mistakes and know that the consequence is a result of the mistake, but there are other times where I'm belwildered. I know I'm in the center of God's will-It doesn't make any sense. As I fall to my knees I'm at a loss for my own words and these lyrics come to mind.....
"I'm so confused
I know I hear you loud and clear
So, I followed through
Somehow I ended up here
I don't want to think
I may never understand
That my broken heart is a part of your plan
When I try to pray
All I've got is hurt and these four words.
Thy will be done."
This is the beginning of the song Thy Will Be Done by Hillary Scott. This is a song that my heart often cries out when I can put it into my own words. The song goes on to repeat "Thy will be done" over and over and I find myself clinging to these four words.
No one ever said that life was going to be easy, and God especially never told me that following him would make my life easier. But sometimes as Christians we put off the message that accepting Jesus as your savior will make your life easier- Sometimes people even think that if something bad happens it must be because you are not in God's will. But in reality "picking up our cross and following Jesus" might be the hardest thing we've ever had to do. There are going to be times when you are in the center of God's will when everything made sense and then suddenly it falls apart. The song goes on to say...
"I know you're good
But this doesn't feel good right now
And I know you think
Of things I could never think about
It's hard to count it all joy
Distracted by the noise
Just trying to make sense
Of all your promises
Sometimes I gotta stop
Remember that you're God
And I am not"
The song goes onto express exactly what my heart is thinking...and sometimes the part I forget. Yes, it doesn't feel good. Yes, it makes absolutely no sense. But God has the bigger picture and He is God, I AM NOT. Ultimately He has allowed this to happen even if it doesn't make sense to me. And Yes I am hurting, but that doesn't mean God doesn't care and it doesn't mean that He isn't hurting with me. So whether it is a relationship, a job opportunity, or something I have been been praying about I cling to Him and..
"Like a child on my knees all that comes to me is
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
I know you see me
I know you hear me, Lord"
And I choose to trust in His promises even though I might not understand right now. Someday I will and now I choose to accept His will in my life.
Hillary Scott-Thy Will Be Done
