A Quarter of a Century

Wow. Twenty-five. I can’t believe that I am a quarter of a century old. I don’t feel old exactly, but it really doesn’t seem like I have lived for that long. It seems like time has gone by way to quickly for it to already have been 25 years.

I have been told that the years will only go by quicker as I grow older. That is a little scary to me...I don’t want to get to the end of my life and wonder what I did with all that time. I don’t want to miss out and I certainly don’t want to regret the time that I do have.

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank you for all the time that you have given me so far. This year I really desire to be present. I don’t want to miss out on the little moments because I am regretting the past or thinking about the future. God, please teach me to be present-grab my attention when I am missing out. Guide me in the way you want me to live this year, and for the rest of my life.

Please help me to enjoy the little moments-to see you throughout each day, whether it is in one of my kiddo’s laughs, a hug from a love one or a beautiful sunset. Help me to not let life just pass me by, but to live my life to the fullest. To live out the purpose that you have created me for. And God, Thanks for doing life with me and caring about each little detail. <3

Amen

Looking Forward-2018

Next year will be the year 2018. A year of many new things. Next year I will marry the love of my life. I am currently preparing for the adventure of a lifetime. If you would have asked me a year ago, where I would be today I would not have been able to imagine it. Even as a little girl, I dreamed of marrying a wonderful man, settling down, and starting a family. I suppose most little girls have this dream. Maybe even more than dreaming of marriage, most little girls dream of their wedding day.

They dream of walking down the aisle in a beautiful white gown, shiny jewelry, a veil or maybe a tiara. They dream of the colors and the flowers, of the meal and of the cake, and of the people that will be there to celebrate with them. And not to mention, dreaming of the man who will share that day with them.  As that little girl grows older, the pressures of social media helping to solidify an idea of how their wedding day has to go. Pinterest boards grow as teenagers pin pictures of dresses and hairdos, and maybe even engagement rings that they like. Pins of flowers, gowns, wedding parties, tables, DIY decorations, and foods begin to pile up and compile a 'fairytale wedding'.

I will not lie and say I do not have a Pinterest board. That I don't have pictures of bridesmaid dresses, flowers, and table settings.  Or even that I am not excited to go pick out a wedding gown and find the perfect hair style. Because I am. But more than that I am excited to spend hours with my fiancé pouring over ideas together. I am excited to make home cooked meals that we will eat while looking over our song and guest list. To sit by his side and dream of our special day and make plans together that will soon become a reality.

I cannot wait for the day that I walk down the aisle, with my father by my side, looking up at the man that I will spend the rest of my life with.  I am excited to worship alongside of him and everyone that is there to celebrate our special day together. I am excited to say "I do" and exchange our vows-not to mention share our first kiss as a married couple. I dream of the moment we will get to dance to our song; the song that I feel was written just for us and is able to perfectly say what is always on my mind. I also know that the flowers and table settings and food will be wonderful, and that we will enjoy seeing everyone that we love.... 

But more than any of the wedding planning and the actual wedding day, there is something else that I am looking forward to next year. Because as beautiful as a wedding is and as much as I appreciate the symbolism and declaration-it is just one day. One crazy day that people often get so caught up in, that they do not think past that day. Next year what I am most excited for is growing with my best friend. Not just when we get married, but each moment leading up to it and after it. 

Life is made up of little moments that make memories. Each little moment is an opportunity to grow whether for the worst or the best and in the case of a relationship, whether closer together or farther apart. The year 2018 is a special year because I get to say "I do" to my best friend. Each moment before our wedding will be dearly cherished, as I already am cherishing each moment. I will continue to cherish each moment after we exchange our vows. It does not end there...living together and waking up with his face next to mine. Continue to cook meals together, listening to each other share about work, and taking care of our home together.

 

There will be laughter and mushy moments, but there will also be tears and frustrating moments. I look forward to the hard times just as much as the fun and easy moments. Because it is in these moments that God will challenge us and help us to grow. We will continue to learn how to disagree and compromise, and how to forgive and unconditionally (agape) love each other. It is during next  year that my soon to be husband and I will continue to build up the foundation that God has laid before us. The foundation that we will build the rest of our lives upon. 2018 will be a year to remember because I am looking forward to doing life with my other half.

All photographs taken by: Danielle Trista Photography

http://danielletristaphot.wixsite.com/danielletrista

Recently I had the opportunity to return to Costa Rica and to visit Guatemala for the first time. There are two things that I love most about traveling. The first is that traveling to new places and seeing new cultures always allows me to have a deeper view of who God is through discovering and understanding (a little) of parts of Him that I had not know before. And the second is the relationships. The relationships with people that I am able to renew and create new memories with and also the new relationships that I am able to build. There is something special about having friends all over the globe.

I was able to travel to Costa Rica, to attend my dear friend, Teresa's wedding. Teresa was one of the girls that I did my DTS in YWAM with and I had the amazing opportunity to stay with four of my different DTS leaders and connect with many beloved friends (family).

Costa Rica here I come!

Breakfast with my YWAM outreach leaders and my dear friend Nina.

The adorable room I stayed in.

The entrance of where the wedding took place and one of the flower arrangement

With Teresa-such a beautiful bride <3

My first time back on the YWAM base since June 2013.

Pops Ice cream with Nela and her family!

This was my first time going to Guatemala and I stayed at Fundaniños. Fundaniños is a children's home and I had the opportunity to spend four days observing classes at the school they have on campus and spending time getting to know the children. Even after just four days it was very hard for me to leave. I am praying that I will have the opportunity to be further involved there in the future. 

The view from Fundaniños

Some of the pre-school age children that I had the opportunity to read to and spend time with.

I am so thankful for the opportunity that God had given me to go on this trip. And I am especially blessed by the memories that were made and the people that have touched my heart.

Thy Will

As I am writing this, my heart is hurting. Sometimes I make mistakes and know that the consequence is a result of the mistake, but there are other times where I'm belwildered. I know I'm in the center of God's will-It doesn't make any sense. As I fall to my knees I'm at a loss for my own words and these lyrics come to mind.....

"I'm so confused

I know I hear you loud and clear

So, I followed through 

Somehow I ended up here

I don't want to think

I may never understand 

That my broken heart is a part of your plan

When I try to pray 

All I've got is hurt and these four words. 

Thy will be done."

This is the beginning of the song Thy Will Be Done by Hillary Scott. This is a song that my heart often cries out when I can put it into my own words. The song goes on to repeat "Thy will be done" over and over and I find myself clinging to these four words.

No one ever said that life was going to be easy, and God especially never told me that following him would make my life easier. But sometimes as Christians we put off the message that accepting Jesus as your savior will make your life easier- Sometimes people even think that if something bad happens it must be because you are not in God's will.  But in reality "picking up our cross and following Jesus" might be the hardest thing we've ever had to do. There are going to be times when you are in the center of God's will when everything made sense and then suddenly it falls apart. The song goes on to say...

"I know you're good

But this doesn't feel good right now

And I know you think 

Of things I could never think about 

It's hard to count it all joy

Distracted by the noise

Just trying to make sense

Of all your promises

Sometimes I gotta stop

Remember that you're God

And I am not" 

The song goes onto express exactly what my heart is thinking...and sometimes the part I forget. Yes, it doesn't feel good. Yes, it makes absolutely no sense. But God has the bigger picture and He is God, I AM NOT. Ultimately He has allowed this to happen even if it doesn't make sense to me. And Yes I am hurting, but that doesn't mean God doesn't care and it doesn't mean that He isn't hurting with me. So whether it is a relationship, a job opportunity, or something I have been been praying about I cling to Him and..

"Like a child on my knees all that comes to me is

Thy will be done

Thy will be done

Thy will be done

I know you see me

I know you hear me, Lord"

And I choose to trust in His promises even though I might not understand right now. Someday I will and now I choose to accept His will in my life.

Hillary Scott-Thy Will Be Done

Privilege AND Obligation

Since coming back I have had a lot of thoughts on my mind and heart, but as I am still processing I have a hard time verbalizing them. I mentioned that during my time in Ethiopia, God made it very clear to me His heart for missions, so when people ask my about my trip I share about that. Over and over I have left conversations feeling confused and empty over people's responses. Many people seem to look at what I say as "MY calling", but I see it more as God's command, or obligation to follow. Durng this time I have also read the book "Radical" by David Platt. He has been able to much more eloquently state what has been on my heart. 

 When I look at this picture, I think of all the hundreds of people inside these tin houses that may have never heard of Jesus before. 

"I wonder if we in some ways intentionally and in other ways unknowingly erected lines of defense against the global purpose God has for our lives. It's not uncommon to hear Christians say, "Well not everyone is called to foreign missions," or more specifically, "I am not called to foreign missions." When we say this, we are usually referring to foreign missions as an optional program in the church for a faithful few who are apparently called to that. In this mind-set, missions is a compartmentalized program of the church, and select folks are good at missions and passionate at missions. Meanwhile, the rest of us are willing to watch the missions slide shows when the missionaries come home, but in the end God has just not called us to do the missions thing. 

But where in the Bible is missions ever identified as an optional program in the church? We have just seen that we were created by God, saved from our sins, and blessed by God to make his glory known in all the world. Indeed, Jesus himself has not merely called us to go to all nations; he has created us and commanded us to go to all nations. We have take this command, though, and reduces it to a calling-something only a few people recieve.

I find is interesting that we don't do this with other words for Jesus. We take Jesus' command in Matthew 28 to make disciples of all nations, and we say, "That means other people." But we look at Jesus' command in Matthew 11:28, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest," and we say, "Now, that means me." We take Jesus' promise in Acts 1:8 that the Spirit will lead us to the ends of the earth, and we say, "That means some people." But we take Jesus' promise in John 10:10 that we will have abundant life, and we say, "That means me."

In the process we have unnecessarily (and unbiblically) drawn a line of distinction, assigning the obligations of Christianity to a few while keeping the privileges of Christianity for us all. In this way we choose to send off other people to carry out the global purpose of Christianity while the rest of us sit back because we are 'just not called to that.' 

...."Maybe the most common response that arises among Christians regarding the global purpose of God is "What about the needs here? Why do we need to be involved with other nations when there are so many in our nation?" 

...Certainly there are great needs here. But must we insist on dividing the Great Commission into an either-or proposition? Who told us that we had to choose to have a heart for the United States or a heart for the world? Based on the purpose of God we've seen in the Scripture, shouldn't every Christian's heart be ultimately consumed with how we can make God's glory known in all the world? 

...In all this mission's talk, you may begin to think, Well, surely you're not suggesting that we're all supposed to move overseas. That is certainly not what I'm suggesting (though I'm not completely ruling it out!). But this is precisely the problem. We have created the idea that if you have a heart for the world and you are passionate about global mission, then you move overseas. But if you have a heart for the United States and are not passionate about global mission, then you stay here and support those who go. Meanwhile, flying right in the face of this idea is Scripture's claim that regardless of where we live-here or overseas- our hearts should be consumed with make the glory of God known in all nations." -David Platt (taken from pages 72-76)

David Platt goes on to share many examples and stories of people living both overseas and in the United States who are having a global impact. I know that this is a challening and maybe controversial subject for many people, but I think I needs to be considered, talked about, and even applied to our lives. I wish I could quote the entire book-there was so much more that I was impacted by. If you were in anyway challenged, convicted, or encouraged by this excerpt I encourage you to read the whole book; it will be time well spent! 

In light of all I have seen, what God has put on my heart, and what I learning now through the bible and books like this, I am challenged to look at my life and consider both the privileges and obligations that I have as a Christian. Am I living the biblically, the way Jesus has called me to live? What needs to change in my life in order to live out the global command that I have been given? 
In light of all of this, How will you live? 

Platt, David. Radical: taking back your faith from the American Dream. Colorado Springs, CO: Multnomah , 2015. Print.