Our Story-Part 2

Upon coming to the realization that my life wouldn’t be over if I didn’t get married, I started praying about serving overseas and looking into various opportunities. Looking back over the last year, another thing I’ve learned about relationships, is that there are two people involved. Two people who may be coming from very different walks of life. Sometimes timing is everything...just because one person is at a point in their life where they have let go of the past and desires they might have, it does not mean the other person will reach that place at the same time. God often has a way of bringing people together when the time is right for both of those people. 

For Philip and I it just happened to be around the same time, but I’ll get back to that. In February I remember that Philip had recently gotten back from working with the orphanage in Zimbabwe. I messaged him asking how the trip went and was suprised to see how quickly he was responding and how long his messages were to me. It didn’t take me long discover that Phil wasn’t dating anyone anymore. We kept talking more and more, we talked all about missions and God, our dreams, our likes and dislikes and our testimonies.

After about a week of writing back and forth we FaceTimed and we talked for at least an hour. We continued talking about the same things we were writing about and never ran out of things to talk about. Then I started to get a little weirded out. We almost seemed to have too much in common. It seemed too good to be true. I was already wondering if he was the man I was going to marry, but I kept telling myself that I was being ridiculous and there was no way that I could know yet. But looking back now I realize that I did, I was just scared that I was jumping ahead of myself.

As we kept talking, we only found more in common. I think one of the reasons we knew so early on was because of being long distance. We didn’t do things like go to the movies or play games with friends, all we could do was talk...and so we did. We talked and messaged for hours. Up until Philip told me that he was starting to have feelings for me I wasn’t sure if the feeling was mutual on his end. I think he wondered the same thing. But it was. Only a few short months later we started dating the weekend he came to visit me for my graduation, and I guess you could say and the rest is history!

After we started dating and talked more...I realized how God was working things out on Phil’s end while he was working things out in me. While Phil was in college there was a time where he wasn’t living for God. He reached a point where he knew he needed to get things right with God and recommitted his life. After awhile of following God he met a nice Christian girl and they started dating. But around the  time that I handed my future in relationships over to God, the girl he was dating broke up with him. He knew for a day or so that it was coming and spent time praying about it. By the time they talked he felt completely at peace about it. 

Phil’s parents have said to him that seeing how he handled the break was a huge testament to the change in his life and his relationship with God. It was the first major thing that happened in his life since recommitting himself to God. Only a few weeks after that happened and after I surrendered my life to God was when we reconnected. Looking back I can see how both Phil and I both needed to get to certain places before God placed us in each other’s lives for a relationship.

Phil and I will probably never get tired of going back to the story of how our relationship started...because it is such an amazing example of God’s love and care for us. Our story has reminded me over and over that God cares so much about the little details and he knows our hearts more than we can even imagine. One of our favorite songs is called When God made you by NewSong. There is a verse that says,               
“I wonder what God was thinking when he created you. I wonder if he knew everything I would need because he made all my dreams come true. When God made you he must have been thinking about me.”

I know without a doubt that God was preparing and planning for Phil and I to be a part of each other's lives long before we had even met. Phil is everything that I (and my mother) had ever prayed for. He is also many things that I never prayed for...things my heart whispered that my words could never form. As cliche as this sounds, Philip really does complete me. It is as if God made Philip and I in such a way so that when He put us together and when we become one...we will be whole and more effective.

I share this story, because our story is a testimony of God's faithfulness and how much good he has in-store for each of us. No matter where you are at in life and your journey, know that God's timing is perfect. When we allow God to have our focus and trust it allows Him to work more fully in our lives. And as your allow God to work in you He will shape and grow your own desires, with His desires for you. Remember, that even if you are ready for something or someone...there are also other factors coming into play. Continue to serve and trust Him and the Lord will provide. He is preparing you for a lifetime of adventures. I for one am so excited for the adventures that life will bring for Philip and I, with God at our side!

Mark 10:6-9,"At the beginning of creation God 'made them male and female.' For this reason a man will leave His father and mother and be united to His wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer, but one flesh, Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate."

The End (for now).

Photo credits: Danielle Trista Photography

Our Story-Part 1

I often get surprised looks when people ask how long Phil and I have been together; or how long we have known each other. We often get asked our story and how we’ve ended up together-a common question when you are engaged. I don’t know how many times we have already had to share our story and it honestly never ceases to amaze me, how all the little pieces fit perfectly together. 

It’s funny...I remember on multiple occasions, being told when talking about relationships,“When you know, you just know.” I have been through a few different relationships and there were times when I thought I knew, but wasn’t sure. And I would hear people saying that to me when I would get stressed out, thinking...but what does that look like, How do I actually know? 

When you don’t know, it is hard to understand what other people are talking about. But with Phil, once I knew, I really KNEW. All those little pieces just fell into place and I knew. Phil is the man I am supposed to marry. Other times I ‘thought I knew’ seem pale in comparison. I honestly laugh when I think about those times and how I had no idea what was in store. 

It didn’t take very long for both Phil and I to know, but each person’s story is different. I don’t ever want anyone to think that their own story isn’t valuable or that it has to happen the way ours or the way someone elses did. God brought Phil and I together at exactly the right time for us...at the time when we were ready for each other. But that is jumping ahead a bit (bare with me as I will have to jump around a little), because that isn’t actually when we met. 

During the Summer 2016 my mom’s side of the family decided to go camping for the weekend at Sandy Cove, a Christian retreat center in Maryland. We hadn’t gone in a few years and we just happened to go on the weekend after the Homeschool family camp week. For this particular family camp, there is a family life coach that comes every year-all the way from Illinois with his wife and 9 kids. This family always comes and stays for the weekend before and after family camp ends. 

On Saturday afternoon, some of my cousins, my friend, Heather, and I happened to be sitting in the hot tub talking when a guy came up to us and introduced himself...he told us all that a bunch of people were getting together later in the evening to play volleyball at the gym. Heather loves playing volleyball, so she along with my uncle and cousin went over to play. I joined soon after to watch with my mom and some of my cousins. I remember one of the guys calling over to me and asking why I wasn’t playing. He was cute, but I didn’t think much of it since I was in a relationship. 

After the volleyball game, the guys invited all of us to go to the late night swim. A couple of us went over to the pool...I sat on the edge with my mom and one of my cousins and a few of us were talking. I started talking to the guy that had asked me why I wasn’t playing volleyball. I learned that he graduated from Liberty University and did some work over in Zimbabwe with an orphanage. I happened to be going to Africa (Ethiopia) to student teach, for the first time in the fall. We talked about school and missions for maybe 10 minutes and then joined in conversation with other people.  The next afternoon we left to head back home and I didn’t think anything more of it. 

Fast forward to November/December of 2016 when I was now single and student teaching in Ethiopia. Ethiopia was a huge time of learning and growing for me. After being in relationships that didn’t last, I remember hitting a point where I finally realized something about myself. I realized that if (a very big IF in my mind) there was a guy out there for me, he would have to be a very special guy. Not because I think I am extremely special or anything. On the contrary...because I am a very complicated person and have some pretty extreme dreams. I often take on the burdens of others (sometimes people I know, sometimes people I don’t) and wear my heart on my sleeve. I also have a huge passion for adoption and missions...which I’ve noticed that many Christian guys near my age don’t have a heart for that. 

Letting go of “the need” to be married and controlling my future was not a one time thing for me-it was a process. Realizing what I did, about myself and relationships in Ethiopia was a part of that. Returning home from Ethiopia I knew I wanted to live more actively for God in the area of missions and caring for the world. Shortly after arriving home I saw a post from the guy that I had talked to at Sandy Cove...he had posted a link on facebook about how he, some of his siblings, and friends were raising money for another trip to Zimbabwe. 

I messaged him asking about details of the trip and prayed about giving to the trip. We had a quick conversation about it and he politely asked how I was doing and I asked him as well. Philip (I assume you know who is the guy is by now), mentioned that he recently started working with Young Life. At the time, I was with Heather and mentioned his trip to Zimbabwe; I remember joking to her about how all the great Christian guys were already married or taken. 

Then for some reason (it was odd considering I wouldn’t have normally said things like that), I said to Heather “Too bad...he seems like he would be perfect for me.” Heather laughed and said something along the lines of, “hmm...maybe they will break up.” We both laughed and changed the subject, but I remember quickly praying in my head, half jokingly... “God, he seems like a great guy, but he is obviously taken. Well if there’s a chance he could be the guy for me, you’ll just have to break them up I guess.”

In hindsight I still laugh...I don’t have a clue what possessed me to say that, except maybe there was a subconscious part of me that knew something my conscious self didn’t yet know. After that conversation I forgot about it and went on with my life trying to figure out what I was going to do next and start looking for a job. A month or two later I had finally given over my desire to get married to God. I told him that I would go anywhere in the world that he wanted me to go and if I didn’t ever get married then I would rely on Him and be okay with that. 

To be continued...

Photo Credits: http://danielletristaphot.wixsite.com/danielletrista

Amazon Smile

Recently, I was shocked to discover that there are so many people that have never heard of Amazon Smile before. Yet the majority of us use Amazon (and some more often than others). Have you heard about Amazon Smile? 

I just had to share, because it is an insanely easy way to make a difference. It is very simple. All you have to do after logging in to your Amazon account is type smile.amazon.com into your browser. It will leave you logged in and if you have a prime account it will still use that. After going to Amazon smile you can search the charity of your choosing and select. Amazon has almost a million different organizations that you can choose from. 

Then you are done! From here on out all you need to do is type smile.amazon.com  into your browser before making your purchases. You don’t have to pay any extra for your purchases or do anything else. Using Amazon Smile after it is set up will automatically take .5% of your purchase price (on eligible items) and donate that to your chosen organization. 

As of November 2017 the total given to charities through Amazon Smile was $69,949,133.28 (found on website)!! Wow!! That’s crazy-.5% doesn’t seem like a lot, but it adds up. Think about how much you or other people you know have spent on Amazon...one simple change in a web address and even your purchases will be making a difference!!! Please check it out and tell other people about it too!

*Details of how it works can be found at smile.amazon.com 

Pen Pals

There are so many ways to live intentionally. And for anybody that enjoys writing as I do, this is a simple (not terribly time consuming) way to make an impact. I remember being in 3rd or 4th grade and our whole class had pen pals from another school. We wrote back and forth for most of the year and then we had a picnic with the class from the other school to meet our pen pals. I didn't think much of pen pals after that...but a part of it probably has to do with our access to the internet and how easy it is to keep in touch with people there. But as adults most of us don't have 'pen pals'.

One day, when I was in college I saw an advertisement on a board about collecting gifts for children for Christmas and was intrigued to see a note at the bottom about Christian Pen pals. I was immediately intrigued and wanted to know more, so I took a picture of the poster and looked up the website later on. I discovered that Christian Pen pals is a prison ministry where anybody can sign up to write to a prisoner. 

People of all walks of life, from many different facilities across the country are written to. The prisoner could have asked to be signed or have a friend or relative who may sign them up. And then they wait for someone to write back and forth with. When I signed up to write I was connected with the ministry via email, where I was able to specify that I wanted to write to women.  They also tell you a little bit about the person, like how long they have been a believer or that they are not sure but want to learn more about God, their birthday, how much longer they will be incarcerated for, and if they have any special interests (Sometimes only some of this information is known). 

Sometimes we forget how much just our words can make a difference (for good or for bad). But for someone in prison, words of hope, friendship, and encouragement can make all the difference. Even if you are not much of a writer, just sharing about your every day life and your faith of Christ is more than nothing. I have read amazing testimonies of how these letters made an impact that helped to change a life. And I can attest to how excited the women that I write get about having someone to write to and know about my (a complete stranger's) life. 

This is something that you can do as an individual or as a group. It also does not take up very much time. After I receive a letter it normally takes me a few days to a week to respond and I do it while watching tv or listening to music in the evening. If you feel uncomfortable using your own address it is not hard to set up a P.O. Box and use that as your address (you'll just have to go to the post office to check it every once in awhile). 

Writing with my penpals has also impacted my heart and my prayer life. It is such a simple (and almost free) way to make an impact-to give the hope and light of Jesus Christ to someone who might not otherwise hear it on a normally basis. 

If you are interested you can visit the website for more information and to sign up: 

http://www.cppministry.com/

"Continue to remember those in prison as if you were together with them in prison, and those who are mistreated as if you yourselves were suffering." Hebrews 13:3 (NIV)

The Purification Process

Lately have spent a lot of time reflecting back on my time in Costa Rica in 2012. I spent 5 months doing a DTS (discipleship training school) through YWAM (Youth With a Mission). Even though it was 6 years ago, I am still learning to apply many of the basic truths that I learned to my life. During my first few weeks of school we learned a lot about purification. This is a revamped version of something I wrote during that time. 

No mineral is 100% pure when it is extracted from the earth. Gold for example, need to be heated (melted) to get rid of the impurities. When the gold becomes a liquid, the impurities rise to the top and are scraped off. They continue to melt the gold and scrape off the impurities over and over. You can tell that the gold has finally become pure when you see your reflection clearly in the gold.

Growing in your Christian faith is not always easy. We are born broken and sinners. Becoming like God can be painful-we undergo the process of being "scraped of our impurities". But as we continue in this process God's reflection begins to become more clear and evident in us.

 Purification is a process; we need to restore the altar and temple in our lives. In Ezra 3, the Israelites rebuild God's temple in order to reconcile with him. As human beings, our hearts are our alters. 6 years ago I began a journey towards a greater understanding and process of having a better relationship with God. That journey is a process of purifying my heart. It is not one that I can do alone, but through the help of the Holy Spirit and encouragement of my church body. 

Philippians 3:12 says, "Not that I have already obtained it or have already become perfect, but I press on so that I may lay hold of that for which I was also laid hold of by Christ Jesus," Obviously in this world, I will never become perfect...but growing in relationship with God is process in which I will continue on through my life. While God does look at what is on the inside, as our insides are scraped of impurities and renewed the reflection of this will carry to the outside. Others will begin to see a transformation and a reflection of who Christ is. 

A Quarter of a Century

Wow. Twenty-five. I can’t believe that I am a quarter of a century old. I don’t feel old exactly, but it really doesn’t seem like I have lived for that long. It seems like time has gone by way to quickly for it to already have been 25 years.

I have been told that the years will only go by quicker as I grow older. That is a little scary to me...I don’t want to get to the end of my life and wonder what I did with all that time. I don’t want to miss out and I certainly don’t want to regret the time that I do have.

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank you for all the time that you have given me so far. This year I really desire to be present. I don’t want to miss out on the little moments because I am regretting the past or thinking about the future. God, please teach me to be present-grab my attention when I am missing out. Guide me in the way you want me to live this year, and for the rest of my life.

Please help me to enjoy the little moments-to see you throughout each day, whether it is in one of my kiddo’s laughs, a hug from a love one or a beautiful sunset. Help me to not let life just pass me by, but to live my life to the fullest. To live out the purpose that you have created me for. And God, Thanks for doing life with me and caring about each little detail. <3

Amen

Looking Forward-2018

Next year will be the year 2018. A year of many new things. Next year I will marry the love of my life. I am currently preparing for the adventure of a lifetime. If you would have asked me a year ago, where I would be today I would not have been able to imagine it. Even as a little girl, I dreamed of marrying a wonderful man, settling down, and starting a family. I suppose most little girls have this dream. Maybe even more than dreaming of marriage, most little girls dream of their wedding day.

They dream of walking down the aisle in a beautiful white gown, shiny jewelry, a veil or maybe a tiara. They dream of the colors and the flowers, of the meal and of the cake, and of the people that will be there to celebrate with them. And not to mention, dreaming of the man who will share that day with them.  As that little girl grows older, the pressures of social media helping to solidify an idea of how their wedding day has to go. Pinterest boards grow as teenagers pin pictures of dresses and hairdos, and maybe even engagement rings that they like. Pins of flowers, gowns, wedding parties, tables, DIY decorations, and foods begin to pile up and compile a 'fairytale wedding'.

I will not lie and say I do not have a Pinterest board. That I don't have pictures of bridesmaid dresses, flowers, and table settings.  Or even that I am not excited to go pick out a wedding gown and find the perfect hair style. Because I am. But more than that I am excited to spend hours with my fiancé pouring over ideas together. I am excited to make home cooked meals that we will eat while looking over our song and guest list. To sit by his side and dream of our special day and make plans together that will soon become a reality.

I cannot wait for the day that I walk down the aisle, with my father by my side, looking up at the man that I will spend the rest of my life with.  I am excited to worship alongside of him and everyone that is there to celebrate our special day together. I am excited to say "I do" and exchange our vows-not to mention share our first kiss as a married couple. I dream of the moment we will get to dance to our song; the song that I feel was written just for us and is able to perfectly say what is always on my mind. I also know that the flowers and table settings and food will be wonderful, and that we will enjoy seeing everyone that we love.... 

But more than any of the wedding planning and the actual wedding day, there is something else that I am looking forward to next year. Because as beautiful as a wedding is and as much as I appreciate the symbolism and declaration-it is just one day. One crazy day that people often get so caught up in, that they do not think past that day. Next year what I am most excited for is growing with my best friend. Not just when we get married, but each moment leading up to it and after it. 

Life is made up of little moments that make memories. Each little moment is an opportunity to grow whether for the worst or the best and in the case of a relationship, whether closer together or farther apart. The year 2018 is a special year because I get to say "I do" to my best friend. Each moment before our wedding will be dearly cherished, as I already am cherishing each moment. I will continue to cherish each moment after we exchange our vows. It does not end there...living together and waking up with his face next to mine. Continue to cook meals together, listening to each other share about work, and taking care of our home together.

 

There will be laughter and mushy moments, but there will also be tears and frustrating moments. I look forward to the hard times just as much as the fun and easy moments. Because it is in these moments that God will challenge us and help us to grow. We will continue to learn how to disagree and compromise, and how to forgive and unconditionally (agape) love each other. It is during next  year that my soon to be husband and I will continue to build up the foundation that God has laid before us. The foundation that we will build the rest of our lives upon. 2018 will be a year to remember because I am looking forward to doing life with my other half.

All photographs taken by: Danielle Trista Photography

http://danielletristaphot.wixsite.com/danielletrista